– An interactive session by Kajal Makwana

The session on Building Confidence by Kajal Makwana held on 19th June by HCI was a remarkable experience that provided both insightful and engaging content, offering practical steps to help us regain our confidence. The carefully designed activities and thoughtful discussions allowed participants to delve deep into their personal experiences and explore strategies to build a more confident self. This review captures the essence of the session and highlights the key takeaways that made it an enriching event.

Review

The session began with the TWIN CIRCLES Exercise. In the first circle, we wrote down how we manifest low confidence, and in the second, we noted incidents that trigger such feelings. By matching these root causes with their manifestations, we could pinpoint where we stand in understanding our vulnerabilities and how to address them.

We shared stories that started from our weaknesses and envisioned where we wanted to take them. To tackle these issues effectively, Kajal introduced the concept of dividing concerns into two categories: UMC (Under My Control) and BMC (Beyond My Control). For UMC, building confidence involves embracing who we are, working hard, and cultivating good habits. For BMC, using ignorance and humour can be helpful strategies. Applying these approaches can significantly aid in rebuilding our confidence.

Feedback from Tariq (a HCI participant / member)

I gained so much from Kajal Mam’s session. First and foremost, her smile was truly uplifting. The activities were incredibly engaging, starting with the two circles drawing where we compared and matched them. The third activity involved discussing our future goals, which was very enlightening.

Kajal Ma’am also introduced us to various coping mechanisms such as UMC (Under My Control) and BMC (Beyond My Control). We learned about detachment, clarity, and removing clutter from our lives. She emphasized about not giving our power to others, symbolically described as not giving our remote control to others. Daily practices like looking in the mirror, using humour, and practicing silence (when applicable) were also discussed.

The key takeaways from the session were:

1. Be happy.
2. Be confident.
3. Connect with your soul, seek clarity, and pursue knowledge.
4. Dress and groom yourself in a way that makes you feel good.

Feedback from Kalindi ( a HCI participant / member)

Conclusion

Overall, the Building Confidence session by Kajal Makwana was truly inspiring and filled with valuable insights. It offered practical tools and coping mechanisms that are essential for personal growth and self-improvement. A heartfelt thank you to Umangji for organizing such a wonderful event. The experience has left a lasting impact on all participants, equipping us with the confidence to face our challenges and pursue our goals with renewed vigour.

-Written by Arun Upadhyay

-Edited and updated by Mahrukh

Pritha Saha Dutta is a counselling psychologist with special training in CBT & RCBET techniques. She has worked with 1000+ clients and helped them manage their mental health challenges. She has 10+ years of experience in the field. She herself has dealt with mental health challenges like ADHD & Depression and has taken treatment for it.

In yet another session of the Hugging Club Of India’s flagship event ‘Mental Health Experts Talk About Their Own Mental Health Challenges’ held at Amaha, Mumbai, she explained how mental health professionals too can deal with mental health challenges. Like a dentist can have cavities and a heart surgeon can have a heart attack, similarly mental health professionals too can have mental health issues.

As a  child, Pritha was labelled as a ‘naughty’ kid. Her teachers used to describe her as a hyperactive kid. When she started studying psychology she came across the term ADHD and self realisation hit her. The day she learned about ADHD her mother got to learn about ADHD too at her ECCL training. In 2021, she got officially diagnosed with ADHD. In ADHD there are three major symptoms that are – Inattention, Impulsivity & Hyperactivity and she had all these symptoms. The day she got diagnosed with ADHD she and her mother realised that she was not the difficult child but she has a condition termed as ADHD.

In childhood, her parents were highly critical of her and tried to correct her ADHD symptoms by being strict with her. The constant criticism and strict parenting focused on correcting her resulted in her putting up a mask to evade the punishments. Putting up a mask and living a dual life is very tough and people who have to live this way are prone to develop anxiety and depression. Due to the masking, Pritha developed Depression and was diagnosed in the year 2021 with High Functioning Depression. Her High Functioning Depression was the result of her burnout and childhood trauma that she endured since her early childhood. She was on medication for a year and half and took therapy for her ADHD. Therapy helps in mental health conditions but it takes time for it to work so medicines are of the same importance as they help people in managing their mental illness faster. ADHD also needs medical attention and more research is going on in this field of psychology. Occupational therapy helps a lot in ADHD where people learn to manage their ADHD.

One of the main reasons behind choosing psychology as a career for Pritha was due to her horrible childhood experiences in school and at home. Her teachers were a bully and treated her badly at school. Later in school, she got support in the form of her Principal who heard her out patiently and guided her with effective techniques on how to manage her studies along with her ADHD. It was a liberating experience for her to learn about ADHD in college and it was freeing to learn that she is not weird but she has a condition.

Considering the mental health challenges the mental health professionals fraternity faces, she started a support group to help her fellow mental health experts.

Talking about trauma, she shares that acceptance is the key to healing. The second step is forgiveness. Sometimes the people who are supposed to be our support system turn out as our bullies and there is nothing we can do about it except for accepting and forgiving them.

While detailing about how she manages her mental health and ADHD, she added that taking occupational therapy is a game changer for people with ADHD. Having a body double is also a good way to manage ADHD. By body double, she means a person who is there for you physically as a support when you are performing your tasks. Having a body double helps people with ADHD to know that they have company and they can rely on the other person.

Our brains are magical and they can be rewired with our efforts. Pritha talked about neuroplasticity and how forming new habits like learning a new skill like a language, playing a new game, etc can help us in rewiring our brains.

One should never stop taking medicine without the consultation of their doctor as this can result in a crash of our chemicals in brain and result in feeling depressed and suicidal.

A lot of us are addicted to Instagram and reels, addressing this issue Pritha adds that while watching reels a chemical called Dopamine is released. Dopamine makes us feel happy when it is released in our brains when we get a reward and watching reels feels rewarding for our brains.

Finally, Pritha concluded with suggesting that we should journal everyday to keep a track of our lives. She also adds that one should never take the role of a therapist for others instead they should refer them to a therapist when in need.

She shares how self sabotage and self comparison is normal human tendency but one should compare oneself with them and focus on becoming the better version of them everyday.

– Written by Arjun Upadhyay

– Edited by Mahrukh

The recent gathering of The Hugging Club of India members at McDonald’s Bandra on 1 May 2024, was a heartwarming and unforgettable experience filled with laughter, camaraderie, and genuine connections. We had the pleasure of joining fellow members for an evening of fun games, heartfelt conversations, and shared moments over delicious coffee, burgers, fries, and coke.

The event kicked off with enthusiastic introductions and warm embraces as members greeted each other with open arms, embodying the spirit of the Hugging Club. We then dove into a series of lively games that brought out our playful sides and fostered a sense of camaraderie among attendees. From icebreaker activities to fun questions, every game provided an opportunity for laughter, bonding, and friendly connection.

Every participant answered a series of questions from ‘What are the three things that would make someone want to be your friend?’ to ‘What are the negatives that people won’t like about you? We also had questions like ‘What are the three mistakes you made in your life? These type of questions gave us a chance to open up more about ourself and our experiences. We had a look back in our lives to figure our mistakes and dived deep in our personalities to find our positives and negatives.

As the evening progressed, the atmosphere grew even more interesting as members engaged in fun questionnaires, sharing personal stories, experiences, and insights with one another. It was truly inspiring to witness the genuine connections and support that emerged as we listened, empathised, and offered encouragement to one another.

Of course, no meet up would be complete without delicious food, and McDonald’s Bandra provided the perfect backdrop for our gathering. We savoured mouthwatering burgers, crispy fries, refreshing coke, and steaming cups of coffee, all while continuing our conversations and strengthening the bonds of friendship.

In summary, the Hugging Club of India meet up at McDonald’s Bandra was a resounding success, leaving attendees feeling uplifted, connected, and grateful for the opportunity to come together in such a welcoming and inclusive environment. I look forward to future gatherings where we can continue to share hugs, laughter, and meaningful connections with one another.

– Written by Arjun Upadhyay

– Edited by Mahrukh

On 1st October 2023, HCI began an interesting series wherein mental health professionals spoke about their challenges while facing their own mental illness.

The first doctor to address us in this series was the renowned Magsaysay award winner Dr. Bharat Vatwani.

Mental Health Expert with a History of Mental Illness !

The problem of mental illness is quite widespread. No class, gender, religion, profession (even if one is a mental health expert! ) is spared.

This is about a journey of a mental health practitioner, Dr Bharat Vatwani, who has dealt with his own mental illness and has offered to talk about it.

He recollects being deeply affected by miseries of destitute, mentally ill and otherwise.  It was one of the triggering factors to his depression.  At times he felt suicidal too.

In his session, Dr. Bharat Vatwani spoke about how one must not feel ashamed about one’s depression or seeking professional help or taking medications if prescribed.

The least one must do is to Reach Out and Help others Reach Out. There Is always Hope.

Outling his journey of a mental health practitioner, Dr Bharat Vatwani, recalled his tough childhood days.

Having lost his father at the age of 12, childhood was an uphill struggle along with his mother and siblings, in trying to make ends meet.

Dr.Bharat Vatwani did his Post Graduation Degree in Psychiatry from Seth GS Medical College & KEM Hospital, Mumbai.
The good doctor founded Shraddha Rehabilitation Foundation at Karjat, in the year 1988, to deal with the tragedy of the mentally ill destitute wandering aimlessly on the streets of India.

He faced strong resistance from local residents, when he tried to set up this small rescue facility in a residential area.

In one isolated incidence of rescue, he happened to meet Baba Amte and his son Prakash Amte. Both became a source of further inspiration to him.

His resilience, sincerity, efforts, and support from his wife and others along with a virtual “Obsession” with the cause led him to establish Shraddha at Karjat .

Imagine 10000 reunions! Each a story in itself.

Knowing him is important from many angles.

His candid chat revealed that ‘Any Person’ can have vulnerabilities, stress issues, depression, suicidal thoughts. The Doctor, being a mental health practitioner himself, is candid about his depressive phases, having sought and received help and support through counselling. He is not opaque about having taken medicine for the same.

He further stressed the fact that – If interacting with a psychiatrist / counsellor does not work for any reasons, one must express to the latter or look for another while understandably, it might be difficult to switch to another resource.

Different approaches work for different people.

Yoga, Spirituality may work for some, while some people could be averse.

Professional guidance is of absolute essence; the psychiatrist will work along with the patient as a team, and suggest a suitable solution to address the issue. Depression may not go away completely, but can be managed.

Coming back to the cause, looking at it conversely –

Who would have thought there was hope for mentally ill destitute. They were rescued. We all could too, no matter who we are. No doubt a lot more needs to be done. And it will always be incomplete.

Dr Bharat Vatwani was awarded Ramon Magsaysay Award in 2018.

He is truly a lesson in humility and noble intentions.

– Written by Sanjay Thakur
– Edited by Mahrukh

Welcome to a groundbreaking event where vulnerability meets courage, and stigma is shattered. In this unique and deeply moving gathering, we invite you to join us as mental health professionals bravely open up about their own experiences with mental illness.

Breaking the Silence: Mental Health Experts Talk About Their Own Mental Illness is a unique session where an individual working in the space of mental health will uncover their own vulnerabilities and the journey towards recovery.

🧠 Why This Matters
For too long, there has been a stigma surrounding mental health within the community. This event aims to challenge that stigma by providing a platform for mental health professionals to share their own struggles, triumphs, and insights, fostering empathy, understanding, and solidarity.

When – 28th April, Sunday
5:00 – 8:00 PM

Where – Amaha Mental Health Centre, 601, 6th Floor, Notan Heights, 20 Gurunanak Road, Patkar Blocks, Bandra West, Mumbai

(https://maps.app.goo.gl/dUJCbLo1hYZGedb19)

The Hugging Club Of India is an initiative to remove the stigma around mental illness.
It is a support group where we openly talk about our mental health challenges.

IG
https://instagram.com/huggingclub?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y

Fb
https://www.facebook.com/thehuggingclubofindia/

Website
http://huggingclubofindia.org/

Summer’s here and so are our many interesting sessions at the Hugging Club of India.

Since the last 6 years we have been involved in organising mental health sessions both online and offline with psychiatrists, therapists, counsellors and other inspiring mentors for HCI members every Wednesday and Sunday evenings. We have also been hosting interesting meets for HCI members to give a boost to bonding and the spirit of sharing, socialising and spreading fun.

We are committed to remove the stigma around mental illness, encouraging those suffering to liason with doctors and therapists and helping each other so that an HCI member doesn’t feel alone in his or her journey towards recovery.

Here’s the schedule of events and meets for April, 2024 for participants to mark their calendars beforehand and join us for our sessions.

Hope to see you there! Looking forward to Hugs and Smiles.

The Hugging Club of India (HCI) is in the forefront when it comes to unique themes for sessions. On Sunday 21st April, 2024 HCI organised a cooking meet at Dr. Vani Kulhalli’s Vile Parle East clinic.

Here’s an account of the happenings in the words of one of the member participant.

Never miss an opportunity to be at a place where 20 guys are expected to come together. ☺️ Thanks to Dr. Vani Kulhalli for offering her clinic for our meet and thanks to HCI for organising an interesting meet-up session.

Some of the highlights –

1. Everyone was asked to associate one’s name with some dish.
   
2. There were activities like ‘Spin the Bottle’ with Q&A, some nicely sung songs and a good dance performance.
   
3. Guys came out with some of their ‘hard to share’ feelings.
   
4. A lot of them showed dedication and prepared delicious Bhel.
   
5. There were sweets, dhoklas, a variety of fried munches; Cool “Aam Panna” was a welcome drink and kept doing rounds during the entire session.
   
6. There were some spontaneous jokes and there were some healthy disagreements.
   
7. At times it hardly looked like anyone was depressed, though everybody knew, everyone had stress issues of one kind or the other. That implicit understanding is a natural takeaway at HCI meets.
   
8. While problems/issues remain, HCI comes across as a much-needed support structure.
   

Thanks to everyone for attending.

Phir milenge !

– Written by Sanjay Thakur

– Edited by Mahrukh

On Wednesday 17th April 2024, HCI hosted an interesting interactive session on the topic of Healing Through Expression: Embracing the Power of Artistic Therapy with Haider Jasdan.

Over the years, I had known this name Haider Jasdan and seen him at 2 or 3 social meets/events – but never really talked to him. Felt it would be interesting to know more about a mystery called Haider Jasdan. I finally joined the session a bit late along with the eager audience of around 12-14 HCI members.

Haider talked about his own battles with mental health , in the years when he used to suppress his feelings. Subjected to bullying during his academic years, he dealt with a lot and the situation just kept getting worse.

Eventually having reached the limits of his bearing capacity, he sought professional help. There was some progress, but the situation seemed to be just lingering on.

He was encouraged to start writing whatever he felt like during a counselling session. From insignificant, incoherent words , through persistence, he went on to write poetry and discovered his comfort zone and passion.

Realising the gravity of the problem, the family finally (though somewhat late in the day) became a good support system for him. 

With this ability to express his feelings through writing poetry and  art ( dramatics on stage) coupled with support from home, professional counselling and medication, he was able to deal with his mental illness much more effectively.

He was inspired by his recovery and thought of finding his own way of helping others.

Haider Jasdan is now a Professional Counselor himself!

After sharing his experience, there was a short interactive Q&A session. His composure was hard to believe, considering the struggles he had been through.
Will strongly suggest Haider’s presence (whenever he can make it) as an audience during the HCI online meet so that he can enlighten us with his inputs on the same from time to time.

Thanks to Haider Jasdan  from everyone at the HCI!

– Written by Sanjay Thakur

– Edited by Mahrukh

10^th March, 2024 saw us at HCI celebrating Women’s Day in a unique way. Dr. Sonam Kapse, a changemaker and an inspiring woman graced our session with her presence and her pathbreaking work.

Dr Sonam Kapse specializes in Molecular Diagnostics from Tata Hospital Mumbai. She is the founder of India Millets Co which focuses on Diversity, Equity and Inclusion and promotes disease-free eating and holistic social dining concepts.

She has also founded Terrasinne Food Corp LLP, the first Restaurant to gain global recognition, run entirely by PwDs. She has trained and employed people with down syndrome, hearing impaired, visually impaired, autistic, locomotor disability, cerebral palsy, and developmental and learning disabilities.

She has developed unique training programs for multiple disabilities following a scientific approach based on behavioural analysis, physical traits and emotional intelligence.

Empowering the marginalised

A scientific approach towards disabled and marginalized sections to empower them for generating a stable lively hood is the key driving motto of Terrasinne restaurant run by Dr Sonam Kapse. She is a living example of “just giving free GYAN is not enough to bring an impact -execution matters!” Celebrating women’s day could not be more meaning full with her being a special guest on Hugging Club of India, a socio-cultural platform which openly talks about mental health challenges.

A society is a combination of good, bad, variety of people and personalities. Working them out in the right mix, with the right proportions will create a healthy salad which Dr Sonam is already serving at her restaurant.  This enterprise offers employment for differently able people to show that harmony is achieved by coexisting as equals. It is a well designed scientific model of holistic social dining and “wellness” providing the social, financial, and emotional support. What better could be than this – implementing diversity, equity and inclusion, rather than colorful poster mails by HR team right?

Dr. Sonam also serves as a cancer genetic specialist from Tata hospitals Mumbai, showing us that disability is not in the genes. It’s the inability of our mind to perceive the reality and her restaurant Terrasinne has proved it. Once an employee from her restaurant who suffered from epilepsy collapsed because of seizure and startled the crowd. The situation was positively handled by the colleagues with Down’s syndrome and addressed the customer crowd about the awareness and normalizing the disability and helping him to restart the work again. This was an example how her scientific model operates for a promising society.

The many addictions of a modern society

Mind is an extended organ of our body often prone to diseases or disorders similar to other parts of the physical body, and underrated one as well. The basic innate human nature is to ‘respond to the stimuli’ by talking out or sharing our mental health concerns. “This is the best psychological way of surviving the disorder and gives the definition of socio cultural bonding” says Dr Sonam.

Addiction is one of the disorder she emphasizes on. Usually the word addiction is associated with smoking, alcohol and psychotic drugs, forgetting that it has already mutated like covid virus in the form of social media, caffeine, binge eating and many more. The best way to combat is to go back to your roots of strengthening the human bonds normalizing it for seeking help. She herself approached for medical assistance in recouping addiction for caffeine and postpartum depression proving even doctors need professional support.

A reassuring Q & A Session

Our world operates on the principle ‘time is of the essence’ which is a biggest misconception, a positive change takes its own sweet time. I didn’t become an activist or voice of the marginalized overnight. One should be patient enough to self accept, learn, evolve and implement. This is mantra behind of true happiness she quoted.  Q and A sessions with her were indeed found to be reassuring and realistic.

“The person who takes abuses and doesn’t fight back is equally held responsible as the abuser” it’s time for you to reach out and help others to build a family which is not only defined by blood” was the inspiring solution given to Kavitha (Name changed) and like other women facing the domestic and physical abuse by her family. Kavitha also reached out Hugging Club of India for professional assistance and received helping hands, showing a positive change in her life and confidently handling her problems.

Dr Sonam explained that the role of physical activity or exercises is the best way to fight back anxiety and depression and it was is the key take away to youngsters like Mr Manu (Name changed) who is battling in his daily life. So is accepting a negative comment and reverting back with positive attitude, which makes life sweeter with a pinch of salty comments thrown at us, she answered Mr Manoj (Name changed) a business man from Mumbai.  A combo of good food, sleep and physical activity is the best prescription she gives for a worthy life and it is right time to execute this.

Thus ended a session that was truly remarkable and inspiring, challenging us to change our beliefs and look at the disabled section of society in a new way with open eyes and a broad mindset.

– Written by Tejas Pushpa

– Edited by Mahrukh

It was HCI’s day out on 20th March 2024. An evening for coffee and conversations, for burgers and banter, for frappes and fun! No prizes for guessing that the meet was at McDonalds!

But it wasn’t just any McDonalds outlet. It was the one at Linking Road, Bandra, Mumbai.
Why is that special?
Well, the place has a historical context in more ways than one. It was the first ever outlet of McDonalds in India. This was also the same place where a bunch of LGBT people met one eventful evening in 1998 and were eventually asked to leave by the store management, as they could not be allowed to occupy the space for long hours on a Sunday evening. That is when one member offered to host the meet at his aunt’s house and it led to the birth of GayBombay. Umang, being the founder of both GayBombay and HCI was present on both the evenings, 26 years apart!

Sharing our stories

The evening started off with an ice-breaking round of two word introductions with each one calling out their names and what they do for a living. We then played a few word games like calling out each other’s names and associating them with a food item (talk about whetting the appetite!). Once we were stuffed with burgers, coffee and coke, a bit of the serious stuff started. Everyone shared one life event of theirs which led them to learn or stumble upon a life lesson. That was eye opening as stories poured out that gave insights to people’s lives and how they overcame issues. The discussion was open, frank and no holds barred. We also had a few people who had travelled the world and came from abroad. They also shared their insights from their travels and how they adjusted to foreign lands having different cultural sensitivities.

Hugs and Smiles

The evening ended with smiles and hugs all around, the clicking of cameras and a promise to keep meeting regularly to keep the kettle of friendships and bonding ever bubbling. How serendipitous that 20 March was also the International day of Happiness. What a delightful coincidence!

– Written by Amit Rai
– Edited by Mahrukh